As a young boy, trapped and oppressed by Akito, Yuki was told repeatedly that his existence was meaningless and that he wasn't needed. Forced to listen to these words every day, he began to believe them, though deep down somewhere he must have known that it wasn't true, because one day, he ran out of the Sohma house - he couldn't take it anymore.

Yuki ~ Chapter 85 I couldn't think straight. I just wanted to move, to run. Maybe I wanted to hurt myself, or maybe I wanted to feel better. I was bad at giving up. That was probably it.

Wearing the hat that Kyo had abandoned, as he ran and ran, he suddenly found a hysterical Kyoko Honda (though of course he didn't know who she was) screaming for the police to find her daughter, who had apparently been lost for some time. On hearing this, Yuki remembered that maybe he had passed by a girl that fit the woman's description - in short, an adorable little girl with adorable pom-poms in her hair - and doubled back to find her. He was able to find her and was thinking of going back to inform the woman, but found that the girl was simply following him and crying. Though he was worried about her catching up to him and accidentally hugging him, he led her back to her mother, leaving the hat with Tohru as a token of congratulations for finding her way home. Running so much, though, had taken its toll on his frail body, and as soon as he ran out of Tohru's sight, he transformed into a mouse to suffer alone. But was he actually suffering? No. Perhaps for one of the first times in his life, Yuki was happy.

I'm ... I'm so happy. Was I able to help ... even just a little? Was I? That makes me so happy. I'm so, so happy! That's right. I remember. There was a time, a moment, when somebody needed me. Even if no one else remembers. Even if you yourself forget. That moment still happened. I know it did.

For the first time in his life, Yuki's existence was validated - someone needed him - his existence wasn't pointless, after all. He cried tears of joy, instead of tears of despair. Though technically Yuki was the one who did the rescuing, this was the first time that Tohru saved him, and it wouldn't be the last time. Yuki didn't know her then, but Tohru would return to his life and continually rescue him from himself. She made him, as he later reflects, a necessity, and that brought him incredible joy.

Tohru herself remembered the incident very well. She reflected to her friends that the boy who saved her, though she didn't remember his face and never knew his name, was "her first love." (Fodder for the Yuki/Tohru shippers out there! Except not.) Yuki, on the other hand, upon realizing that this girl he saved was Tohru, felt that this was the beginning of her warmth in his life and the start of his healing.

Yuki ~ Chapter 59 I want to believe that my hopes aren't for nothing. I want to believe ... that there really is more to life than darkness. Just like, even if I'm pelted with rain ... I know the sun will come up again. No matter how much I'm knocked down by pain... kindness has continued to fall down on me. Ever since that day. Always ...

Castles In Air is a fanwork © Chrissy 2012 - 2020. No infringement intended.